Purpose

Everything has a purpose, clocks tell you the time, trains takes you to places. 

I'd imagine the whole world was one big machine. 

Machines never come with any extra parts, you know. 

They always come with the exact amount they need. 

So I figured if the entire world was one big machine... I couldn't be an extra part. 

I had to be here for some reason. 

And that means you have to be here for some reason, too.

-Hugo Cabret-

As much as I enjoy being a mother, somewhere along the way during the past 5 months I lost myself somehow. Just recently it hit me that I don't even know what completes me as a individual. Perhaps I let myself drown too deep into the role of a mother and suddenly my whole life revolves around parenting stuff, even in my spare time.

Therefore I am in a new mission of finding back my purpose of living. Starting by managing time more carefully so that my day won't be stuck with only taking care of Raphael, cleaning the house nor reading the social media. I just realized that even though I am a planner junkie, my life recently goes without any, which somehow makes me feel like I am wasting time by doing nothing as suddenly the months goes by.

Scheduling day to day activities is my priority at the moment, which I've never had before since I became full time housewife. What I have in mind is scheduling days for doing the laundry, cleaning the house and cooking day, in which I would cook more so I could store the food for days when I don't feel like cooking or when Raphael is having a bad day. By doing so, hopefully I would have more of my 'me' time, then afterwards I would start focusing in figuring out what I really want to achieve in life.

Some advice, readers?

Cheers,
Indispensable Lady

Express Your True Self

Some researches say that people personality is determined by genetics and couldn't completely change along with ages. In my opinion, the older people are, most tend to be more wiser and secure about themselves, and in consequence they would feel more freedom to express the 'real' personality of themselves once they are older. This 'real' personality might be completely different than the one we 'fake' to others when we were insecure. At least, that's what I feel about myself.

I could recalled back in the days when I was still a teenager, there were lots of pressure to be likable and cool. As seen and witnessed by many, in school, the peer pressure is so huge that kids are trying so hard to blend and afraid to be different from the crowd, unless they want to be called geek or nerd. I remembered being one of those kids. I used to use "Aku-Kamu" instead of "Gua-Elu" in conversation, because I was being told that "Gua-Elu" is kinda rude when I was in elementary school. However when I went to junior high school, everybody used it and I felt like only geek and conservative kids used "Aku-Kamu", so I tried so hard to change it into "Gua-Elu" when I talked to others. It's silly how even the smallest habit such that one should be changed just because I was too afraid to be different, right?

As time goes by, my perspective started to change eventually and I am more confident about expressing my true self. Funnily, as opposed to whom I was, now I'm proud to be unique and stand out from the crowd. I could define and show the world my real personality better and stand up for what I believe in. I guess having the secure feelings of who I really am, creates more freedom to express myself in any aspects, even in style, creativity and even in attitude. 

For style, I love simplicity and pureness and it shows in my wardrobe, accessories and even home decorations. Most of them are in white, light blue or pastel colors. Most people like the style that represents bold statement and boost luxury or elegance, but I prefer something that look modest and pure, because it represents my personality best.

Yes, I love white and blue simple outfit!

The same preference applied to my signature style in creative works in photography. I love to create a high key photos compared to low key photos. For information, high key pictures are tend to be bright, lack of shadows and contrast and it creates happy and cheerful mood, while low key pictures are the ones that more dramatic, mysterious and gothic. However, many people loves the low key pictures because they attract more attention easily compared to the high key pictures for the dramatic reason. Yet, this is my preference and I don't produce pictures just because I want them to be likable by many.

My High Key Photography Signature Portfolio

While in attitude, most of the time, I have this calm and serene personality, which unfortunately makes me sometimes uncomfortable when I am being around loud and noisy people. However I am also open to others and caring, especially to my close friends. Being an aquarius girl, also makes me independent in some way, which means I could enjoy my time alone as much as I enjoy being around with friends. I guess having interests in various kind of things (photography, traveling, writing, crafts, financial planning and stocks trading) makes me have a lot of things to do during my 'me' time. Nonetheless, people who don't know me well might think I'm a quiet, shy and loner person. Well, they could judge me anything, but this is just who I am :)

I'm even calmer during pregnancy :)

Being able to represent your personality in things that you wear or use is quite important to boost self esteem. At least when you're wearing or using something that represent yourself, you'll feel more comfortable and in consequence it will boost your confidence level. I believe it is one source of channel to express your true self to the world. Recently, you don't only have fashion to present your style, but also gadget, since most people are carrying gadgets with them everywhere nowadays. 

So what is smarter than having a gadget that matches your personality? I really think that it is a smart campaign from Sony Vaio to produce a gadget that can help people express their personality. Recently, Sony just launched Sony Vaio E14P Series, which have five type of personalities: The Extreme Power Spirit, Cool Leading Intellectual, The Precious Romantic Sensual, The Pure and Clear and Heritage Treasure Modern Vintage.

Reading the above long intro about myself, I guess you could easily determine which one of the above type that suits me best. Yep, it's The Pure and Clear! Just looking at the color and design I have fallen in love with this laptop. The combination of white and blue color and also the simple and chic design is really ME! I would love to have one for my daily notebook that I could easily carry everywhere, it's not just useful but also look stylish too!

Picture is taken from: Female Daily

So, no more be afraid to express your true self! If anyone judge you for being different, just say this to them with proud: Because it's me! It's who I am :)


Cheers,
Indispensable Lady


Notes:
For more info on Sony Vaio E14P Series, visit:
http://femaledaily.com/becauseitsme/ or http://www.sony.co.id/productcategory/it-personal-computer

No Remote Control

I have a friend who don't believe so much in God because he thought that what happen in his life is totally under his control. His success is achieved because he worked so hard and committed to his job and his happiness is truly depends on what he has done instead of given by someone greater than his power. Of course I can't dictate a friend to have the same faith as mine, however I surely could disagree to his perception.

For me, what happen in my life is beyond my control. I could plan and predict, but still the end result is subjected to God's will. I used to be the kind of person who trust God but didn't surrender completely to him. I used to have everything I needed or wanted that I didn't really care about what God really wants me to do. However as life goes by, I learned that not everything that I wanted is good for me and would be given to me. And when I forced it to happen even though God had told me several times to several channels that it wasn't what I needed, it made me frustrated and unhappy. In contrary, when we surrender to what God's will, you'll be more open to other alternate things and chances, instead of pushing and punishing yourself to hard. 

I could say that with such kind of faith, I feel grateful easily. It makes me see all the blessings I have received more clearly and if I counted all of them, they are too many! That shows how good God is to me. In the end, I am more happy than I was before. Happiness is not so hard to find, after all.

I believe there are some who disagree with my way of thinking, they might say if everybody thinks the same as I do, people would be lazy, they won't work hard because they know that no matter what they do, if God don't want them to be successful, they won't turn into one. That sounds pathetic, actually. Of course, we can't just sit down and do nothing, we still need to have plans for our future and give the best that we could to our job or duty. However there are some points when you need to know when to surrender and let God do the rest. It's only a matter about balancing the effort and the faith.

There's a really good old song that reflect best of this blog post:

I Surrender

by Geoff Bullock

You're softening my heart
To the knowledge of Your love
And opening my eyes
You light the way

To love You
Words alone cannot express
All the hope that You have placed
Within me
In between each heartbeat, Lord
I surrender

I surrender to You
I surrender to You
Everything I am and ever hope to be
I surrender to You

You gently pick me up
Wash me with your love
And opening my ears
You speak the Word

Healing
Releasing all the hurts and fears
By the hope that You have placed
Within me
In between each heartbeat, Lord
I surrender

I surrender to You
I surrender to You
Everything I am and ever hope to be
I surrender to You

Cheers,

Indispensable Lady

DIY: Wedding

Planning a wedding for a girl must be an exciting thing to do, especially when we could decide whatever we want to make the whole wedding reflects our personality. I was talking to my friend, Joy, the American girl from my Danish lesson class, about her plans for her wedding next year. As I just found out from the baby shower party, that she's so crafty, I believed she must want to have a DIY (Do It Yourself) wedding, at least for the decoration and accessories. Apparently it is true, she said that she already planned to make her flower bouquet and table centre piece on her own. Even just hearing her plan makes me feel so excited and I really want to help her, if she allows me, of course :-D

I could recall during my preparation for wedding, I browsed a lot to American and Australian's wedding websites where they feature the real American and Australian wedding and most of them have the DIY wedding. It's so lovely to see the handmade decorations or wedding stationeries, and I believe the satisfaction is beyond ordinary when you could make something for your own wedding. Unfortunately, it is impossible to have DIY wedding for my wedding, since the guests that were invited was nearly reached 2000 people, so it's kinda impossible to make so many wedding stationeries or decorate such a big place on my own.

However, I managed to make something for my wedding and I'm so happy about them. At least there are some small parts of my wedding that I made it by myself. The first one is the flower balls to be carried by my bridesmaids and flower girl. I learned how to make flower ball from my aunt who has a florist business. At first, it's kind of hard to make a ball from blocks floral foam (I didn't buy floral foam balls as they are more expensive), but I was getting better after the forth floral foam :-D The hardest part is inserting the ribbon through the ball since there's a chance of breaking the ball when I inserted the ribbon with a thick wire. After that I just sticked the artificial flowers to the foam ball with a glue. Here is the result of my flower ball for my wedding:

Photo courtesy of Indigosix Photoworks

Another thing I made is the "Just Married" banner for golf car decorations. We planned to end the wedding party by leaving the party with the golf cart since we had the wedding party in a golf club. However since the idea is unusual from the tradition in Indonesia wedding party (the bride and groom should stay at the stage until all the guests are finished shaking hands and congratulate us), we couldn't do it. But we still did it anyway after all the guests are leaving the party for photo documentation purposes only, and thankfully it was still fun :) So here is the banner that I made, I designed the banner using Adobe Photoshop and had it printed on a art carton in a local printing service. Then I just cut the banner following the shapes and had them hang with a string.

Photo courtesy of Indigosix Photoworks

So, what crafty stuffs did or will you make for your wedding? Don't forget to tell me what you think about my DIY wedding accessories! :)

Cheers,

Indispensable Lady

PS: I forgot to bring the complete photo CD to Copenhagen when I moved, so I couldn't post the picture of flower ball and the banner on its own. I just took the above photos from Indigosix Photoworks facebook page, instead.

Do What You Love

One of the still life object I took from the lesson and got compliment from Mr. Darwis :-D

My love for photography was started when I was in university. I joined a photography club and started to learn how to operate camera and the photography techniques since then. For me, photography is a channel to express creativity. I have always wanted to contribute something to the creative industries and admired those who can inspired others with their creativity, however haven't found a channel that suits me best to express my ideas. I've learned how to draw, how to play musical instruments, how to design stuff with multimedia software; but still I feel like I'm not good at all of them. While through photography, I could express my creativity while still putting my thew in the pictures.

In my early years learning photography, I loved taking pictures of landscape. I guess most of newbie in photography must have gone through this stage. If I could recall, perhaps its because when you found a good scenery, you don't need anything else to make a stunning picture. Therefore it is easier for you to get compliment from others and when you received the compliments, you'll feel better about your skill and somehow it motivates you to keep taking pictures of another amazing scenery.

But then when I know more about the importance of having a concept before taking pictures, landscape photography is not that exciting anymore. In landscape photography, all you need is a good weather, a good timing, a good composition and good technical skill in managing the light in your camera. Perhaps if I travelled alone and have unlimited time, taking photos of landscape could be exciting, since I could have time to plan the photo concept and wait for the right moment. However since most of my traveling time are with families or friends, it's kind of impossible to actualize the idea.

Then I stepped into a higher new stage when I had the chance to learn photography through a formal photography course, in Darwis Triadi School of Photography. They taught us from the very basic techniques and provide us with several genres of photography, such as: still life, architecture, model, landscape etc. From the lesson I realized that I have greater interest in still life photography compared to other genres. The 'love' for still life photography is reflected in my portfolio and even my course friends and Darwis himself agreed that the creativity is shown when I photographing still life objects, while for the other type of objects I couldn't get the best of them. For example when I have to photograph a model and architectural objects, I couldn't feel the same excitement like when I photograph still life objects, and my brain was suddenly kind of stuck that I couldn't think of any concept to make the pictures more alive and interesting. Based on the experience, I realized that the 'love' factor is surely impacted the end result.

I know that we can't be good in everything we do, but my point is when we're doing something we love, a greater and better result would more likely to achieve than when we're doing something we don't love. I know that I'm also not that good in photography, I am far away from being a professional photographer, but the satisfaction when I could take a photo that express my creativity and the appreciation received from others, that is something that motivates me to keep photographing and pursuing the dream to become a pro.

Cheers,
Indispensable Lady

Finding Happiness Through Giving Back

I always believe that happiness is something beyond what money can buy. Sometimes people easily fall into the perspective of happiness is created when we receive something from others, for example love, care, gift or surprises. However there is different level of happiness which aroused when you give something meaningful to others. 

For instance, I've just met a friend in Danish class who loves giving 'meaningful' gifts to others and the gifts are not necessarily have to be expensive, but it should be personal for the ones receiving it. It reminded me that once in the early days, my and some of friends were excited creating a special gifts for our closest friends who were having a birthday or a farewell party. We created scrapbooks with picture and messages from all of us, support messages cubes that placed in a jar and even an happy birthday message board written in an underwear :-D All the efforts are only to witness the others' happiness when they received the surprise gifts. 

Recently I feel so blessed that I have received so much things in life; a loving husband, a healthy unborn baby, a nice home, caring new friends and a good environment to live. All of those things makes me very happy and complete, that helps me to adapt easily in this new country. And one night this question stumbled in my mind, I have received so many good things, but have I given back enough? 

Then I remembered that I had helped a friend who owned a photography company and needed help with his accounting system. Before I was leaving to Denmark, I have helped him creating the system but he hadn't implemented them since he was busy with the renovation of his new studio. And suddenly few days ago, he emailed me to inform that he already used my system to input the accounting transactions and he found it very useful but he still needed help with some issues. So I helped him checking the input to ensure everything is correctly inputted and I gave some recommendation to improve the system and solve the issues. I didn't get paid for it but somehow I feel a huge satisfaction knowing that I helped him with my knowledge and background to create a better accounting system for his company. Somehow I think, perhaps the happiness wouldn't be as great as it is if I helped him just because he paid me for it. That's the power of giving back, isn't it?

So take some time to consider, have you start giving back to others in need? If you feel unhappy with your life, perhaps you could try to give back and experience the amazing feeling afterwards :)

Cheers,

Indispensable Lady

Never Have Enough Time

While I was working as an auditor back then, I used to feel that I didn't have enough time to do other stuff apart from work since the workload is quite high and there is always another deadline ahead of me, no matter how fast I finished the project. Back then I thought how lucky the women who are a full time housewives, they have all the time in the world to do everything they are passionate about and I used to joke with my friend at the office that our next dream job definitely would be a housewife.

Apparently the joke came true for me as I know become one of the them :-D However, I just realized that being a full time housewife doesn't necessarily make you have the 'unlimited' spare time. Recently I often feel that I so much things to do, yet not enough time, especially after I took the Danish lesson and the pregnancy is getting bigger. People might amaze if I said that because then they'll wonder what did I do the whole day.

Well, in the morning from Monday to Friday, except on Wednesday, I go to the Danish lesson. I walk from home at 8.30 AM and then back at home around 1.30 PM from school and have lunch until 2.30 PM, or sometimes even late if I have lunch date with the friends from the school. Then I usually need to take a one hour nap to recharge my energy so I usually could start other activities around 4 PM. That is when I could start to do things I would love to do, such as blogging, browsing, learning about trading, baking cakes or taking pictures. However, I only have 2 hours at maximum to do such things as I have to prepare dinner afterwards as my husband would be back at 5.30 PM. Then somewhere after dinner and before sleeping, I make my homework for Danish class or study the previous lessons, cleaning up the table, ironing clothes, taking a bath and then suddenly it's already bedtime.

I have so many projects that I should do before the baby is born as I would be less likely have time for all of these once I am delivered, there are:

1. Washing the new baby clothes
2. Preparing and arranging the baby stuffs
3. Finishing the jar label project
4. Pregnancy photo shoot
5. Learning and practicing the stock technical analysis

I really think that I should make a schedule to accomplish all of the above projects within the following month so I wouldn't keep delaying them.

I don't know if it was just me or you also feel the same that lately time goes by so quickly, it is as if time goes in a blink of an eye. It's just suddenly another week passed by and then another month and soon another year. Hopefully I have lived my life to the fullest so I won't regret anything when the year passed by.

Cheers,
Indispensable Lady

Tell the World of His Love

I've planned writing about this topic since months ago, yet somehow I neglected this idea of my mind. I guess there's always a challenge when you're about to share the blessings from above :) Well, I better started, then.

Perhaps some of you still wondering, how can my husband and I move to Copenhagen. We do still amaze sometimes when realizing that this dream is finally come true. For us, this opportunity is truly a God's gift.  Firstly the idea is come from my husband, actually he was still my boyfriend at that time :) He joined this company with the urge to be hired as management trainee. Unfortunately the management trainee program was discontinued during the period, so he could only take the position in a sales division instead.

One year later, the company created another program which is similar to the previous management trainee program, with slightly different arrangements. The program was opened for all interested employees but there are several tests and interviews to be going through and there would only be 1 employee accepted for the program to represent Indonesia cluster. My husband applied for the program and after several interviews, he eliminated all the other applicants and became the only Indonesian who participated on the program.

Another year went by and he finally graduated from the program. With the previous management trainee program, every graduate can be transferred to another country as an expatriate. Other countries would open a position for each graduate, so they could work there but still maintaining their job in home base. However, the arrangement was different for the new management trainee program. There would be no special position opened for the graduates, so the graduates should apply from the general recruitment channel and compete with other people, who's not necessarily should join the management trainee program. That means a whole lot bigger challenge and competitors if you want to be able to have the expat opportunity.

Yet, we still believe that God's plan is better than ours and somehow we believe that we could make the dream come true if God thinks that this will do us good. My husband was pretty sure that we could move in November 2011. However there was no good news for the jobs he applied until October. He failed on some last interviews as the interviewers chose another more qualified applicants and another interviewer didn't provide any feedback for the result of the interview, and even there was a certain period around October - November where the company froze the hiring in the entire world due to unfavorable business condition. Surely that was quite disappointing us, but all we could do is hang on to our beliefs.

Near the end of November, suddenly my husband was called for an interview from the office in Copenhagen. It was the position that he had been wanted to have, yet he couldn't even remember whether he applied for the exact position or not, since he had been applied to many kind of positions. He gone through several interviews and finally on November 30, 2011, he received a good news that he was accepted for the job. Amazingly, it was just as he wished that it was gonna be on November. Apparently God wants us to wait a little longer, He taught us to be patient and not stop believing in Him.

We were so grateful and even along the journey of preparation to move to Copenhagen, He never abandoned us. He has blessed us with many helps, even in finding the apartment, we really felt that He had prepared this one for us. As we heard that it was quite hard finding an apartment at Copenhagen during those times. But then at the day of apartment searching, the agent took my husband to a really nice apartment, which is quite big with a fairly price that is within our budget. The agent even told my husband that we were very lucky as the advertisement of this apartment just came up few days ago. It was like this one was prepared for us.

I am telling this stories to share about His greatest love to you guys, so you'll know that He truly is an almighty Father, so never stop believing in Him as He has this wonderful plans for your life. And in times of difficulties, just count on Him, He might want you to learn to be patient, to be faithful. As in the end, you will see that His plan is greater and so much better than ours.

Cheers,
Indispensable Lady

The Power of Mind

The past three days I've been going back and forth to the hospital since it is so hard to arrange an appointment with hospital in Denmark. They asked me to come on Monday to have the ultra scanning and on Tuesday to have consultation with doctor about the ultra scanning result and also have a urine test. Unfortunately yesterday they detected glucose in my urine, so they need me to do the glucose test on the next day. 

I was so anxious, knowing that I have to fast the night before the test until they took the test because I have the gastric problem. Based on previous experiences with fasting, I will end up sick as my gastric  discomfort relapsed. It's kinda stressed me out a little bit, because I don't want to harm the baby and am also worried what the test result would be. In consequence, the mind pressure weakened my body.

Then my wise husband came to the rescue. He reminded me that it is all coming from my own mind. The fear of not being able to stand the hunger, can be erased by substitute it with a positive mind. So the whole night after the fasting period started, I continuously told myself that I could bear the hunger and I will succeed in fasting in order to have accurate glucose test result. Even though I still feel a little bit hungry when I woke up at night and in the morning, but I still could manage to finish the fasting and my stomach is not hurt that much.

That's makes me realize, the mind is really have great power to control our body and emotion. When your mind is full with negativity and fear, the body will react to a condition that you're feared of and also it brings negative emotion. Perhaps that's what also happen in the birth labor. When you fear the pain, the pain will hurt even more. But if you accept that the pain is something normal during labor and your mind keep telling your body that you will be able to bear the pain, then you will be more calm and comfortable facing the labor. Hopefully I can practice this when my time comes :)

And a little bit information about the glucose test process in here, firstly we were given a glucose drink, which contains lots of sugar. It didn't taste that bad, but after you drink it, you'll feel super thirsty so you'll have to drink water afterwards. Then they asked you to wait for two hours and you should be relaxed while waiting, not spending too much energy, yet you couldn't fall asleep. After that they will take your blood from ear and run the test. This is new for me as usually, they took blood from your finger. Apparently it felt less painful than if the blood is taken from finger. If your glucose level is less than 8.9, then nothing is wrong with you. Thank God, mine is 7,5 so it is considered normal.

Cheers,

Indispensable Lady

Never Too Cool for School

Next Monday I'm gonna start the Danish lesson and I feel a little bit nervous yet a little bit excited, knowing that I'm going to learn something new. As long as I remembered, I'm not very good at learning new language. I studied Japanese at high school as we had to take one language for extra curricular and I chose Japanese. Yet, I couldn't remember every single writing in Japanese and the sentence I could remember is only how we say what our name is. Sigh.

Nonetheless, I always have the curiosity to learn new stuffs so it brings some of excitement, as well. Based on my experiences, when learning something, I notice that I am a slow starter, yet I am a quick learner once I got the logic or the complete idea. So hopefully, I could catch up more quickly with the lesson and could use Danish in practice.

Another thing I realized lately is when it comes to learning process, I hardly be able to learn autodidact. I am definitely not a self taught person. I prefer to have a teacher or take courses to help me learn faster. Perhaps that is why I have taken so many courses, such as English lesson, piano lesson, guitar lesson, violin lesson, physics, photography course and even a tennis lesson. LOL. If I look back now, it's amazing to see how many lessons I've ever joined :-D

Then this thought popped up in my mind, I want to challenge myself that I want to try to learn something autodidact successfully. Recently I have this big urge to understand the technical analysis of stock trading. I already have read some books and articles about it, but when it comes to practice, I still don't get the whole idea how to read the bullish or bearish signal, how to pick the right stock, determine the timing and amount to entry and to sell stocks. There are a lot of training of technical analysis in Jakarta, which the investment fee is quite expensive, however since I am far away here, I can not join any. So I think this is really good opportunity to dare myself, could I succeed in learning the materials by myself.

Well, sometimes people tend to underestimate themselves, thinking they aren't be able to do things. Yet when the pressure comes, they are pushed to a higher level and when they look back, they will be amazed seeing that they are capable to do things they never thought. So, this is me, pushing myself to another different level and I promise to you readers, this time I will learn this new stuff autodidact and I'm gonna succeed. Just wait for my updates, perhaps in a couple of months or years :-)

Cheers,
Indispensable Lady

Good News!

I'm not gonna write much today as it's getting late now and my laptop was boycotted by hubby as he just bought this new Diablo 3, a computer game which has been waited for years. I couldn't help but excited seeing him so thrilled getting this long awaited game. Yeah, boys will always be boys :-D

However, I received two good news today from my two best friends. One of them will be getting married soon this year and another one just being in a relationship with a person that he really wants so I feel very happy for both of them :) I know their stories, how the struggling and the obstacle they've been through to arrive at this stage, so it's really a bundle of joy to witness how the fight is finally worth. Hopefully my ears and advices during the struggle are helpful and encouraging. 

Love is in the air. And for those of you who's been in the fight for love, don't give up and keep fighting cause love is definitely worthy :)

Cheers,

Indispensable Lady

Finding Passion, Finding Happiness

If I should mention one book that changed my life, I would definitely refer to the book written by Rene Suhardono, a career coach in Jakarta, which titled "Your Job is Not Your Career." The first thing I remembered written in the book is the very basic question: Are you happy with your life?

It was about a year ago when I found the book and I stumbled on that question. I knew I had a great job and I actually love the job and the challenges. What I was not happy with is the overloaded work and the insane working hours. That made me realized I didn't enjoy doing it anymore, I lost the excitement and passion. And at the end, it made me unhappy and unsatisfied with my life as I have very limited time for other things I love doing.

The book basically encourages people to find the passion of your life, something that you enjoy the most. It says that you're supposed to be passionate about your own job in order to be happy and have a meaningful life. That's when my searching of passion was begun because I do want to be happy with my life.

There are many ways you could do to find your passion. One of them is follow what your heart tells you, and that's what I do when I chose to quit my job. It was not easy at first, especially trying to conceive my parents that this is what I need to do to pursue my happiness, as I didn't use to take such unusual action. Being unemployed after all the years spent in that "big" company, also a really big change for me. I still felt awkward when people asked where I work, as before I could answer the question with pride and while it might be strange for most people if I explained why I chose not to work for a while.

Meanwhile, during my reflection period, I tried to maximize my time doing all the things I always want to do but never had enough time, one of them was taking a photography lesson. I've always wanted to join after graduation, but then I was accepted in that company and haven't had the time to fulfill it. I realized I really enjoy my time during photo session, especially when we have to be creative and think out of the box to create outstanding photos.

The book also suggests us to try as many new things as possible to find passion, as you might have more than one passion in your life. I do know that I have passion to help people, and in order to help others, I have to use the ability that I am good at, which according to my background, is dealing with numbers. That's why I decided to join a financial plan training, even though the training fee is quite costly, I believe it would give me a comprehensive knowledge how to make a financial plan, so I could share it to others in need. It really is a joy when I could enlighten my friends and relatives after a consultation or discussion, so they could be more aware with their future financial plan.

Up till now, I'm still on the search of finding my other passions. Who knows if one of them someday turns into a real career? The important thing is if you ask me now, am I happy with my life? I could confidently answer, yes! Having a freedom to do things you enjoy doing surely change people feelings and attitude towards life.

I don't encourage you to quit your job recklessly, but if you are not happy with your life because you are not satisfied with your job. Take a time to think what are the things you love to do, the things you enjoy the most. Since when you love what you're doing, you'll pour your heart 100% to it and surely a good result will be achieved. And if you haven't figured out what your passion is, do things unusual, try things you've never tried before, as it will open you to new excitements and perhaps one of them might be your passion.

Cheers,
Indispensable Lady

1,000 Blog Hits Giveaway

Viewing my blog this morning and I'm super happy as my blog reached 1,000 hits less than a month! Yeay!! Super thank you to all readers! I have promised to myself, if the blog hits reached 1,000 in a month, I would prepare a giveaway and surely I have something special for you readers.

It's a cash flow budget template to help you make the cash flow as I've mentioned earlier in the post "Big Spender vs Big Saver". Read it first by clicking the link, if you haven't, to give you a complete idea why having a personal budgeted cash flow is important. Basically, this is an Excel format, where you can input your income and expenses in the white colored cells, and the rest of the counts will be calculated automatically. If there is a type of expense that is not applicable to you, just put zero (0) on the blank cell.

You could download the file here: Cash Flow Budgeting Template


I wish it is useful for you guys, as I used the same format to make cash flow budget and also to monitor the actual expenses. If you find any difficulties filling the form, just drop a comment here and I will help you to go through it.


And before I ended the post, I would like to say a warmest congratulation for my twin sister! She's getting married today in Jakarta and sadly I couldn't be there for her. However I believe she knows that my prayer and heart will always be with her. I'm so happy for her!!! These are some of her pre-wedding photos that I took in New Zealand. Wish her a very happy marriage ahead :)

Cheers,

Indispensable Lady

A Moment Alone

Life surely changes people. If I recall myself years back then, I was a very insecure child. I remembered I couldn't even get through just one day in kindergarden without crying because I was being bullied by the boys at kindergarden. Having to go to school was such a nightmare at that time, every morning I wished the school bus came late so I wouldn't have to meet the boys or at least the class already started so the boys couldn't tease me.

I'm not sure until now, whether it was my vulnerability that attracted bad boys to bully me at school or the bully that made me vulnerable. However the nightmare memory from childhood, really affected my self-esteem during my youth period. I was a very shy and introvert person. Even though I have some close friends, I didn't really open myself to them. I was afraid to speak in public and I spoke very softly that teachers barely couldn't hear. Another issue I noticed is I didn't like to be left alone, especially in new environment. Fortunately I have my twin sister almost in every activity, which avoiding me from being all alone, without realizing that I became dependent on her, only to make friends.

As a result, when we went to junior high school, my parents decided that the school should placed both of us in different classes and I struggled to make friends with people in my class, while my twin sister quickly had a clique from her class. I started to feel that I was left behind. Even though I managed to have few friends to hang out with, I wasn't really close with them. I felt lonely a lot during that period.

It was until I joined this one youth community, where my social life started getting better and better. I could say that the community changed me as a person. The activities involved in that community require the member to speak in public, share our thoughts and feelings to others and contribute our talents and creativity. Slowly, I gained more self-esteem and could open myself to others and engaged more with other people. 

However, the big changes from being solo into having a lot of friends, resulted in me becoming dependent with having friends or other people surrounded me. I still feel insecure being alone. I recalled that I didn't feel comfortable when I have to rent a room near my University as my campus is quite far from home. The insecurity aroused as I didn't know anybody in my building but I also didn't like being alone in my room, as I have no company. As a result, I tried my best to avoid staying too long in my room, either I spent my days in my friends' room in other building or went home. I guessed the childhood trauma was not completely gone.

As I grew older, I managed to find serenity by being alone. I realized I am no more afraid with the fact of being alone. Since I moved here in Copenhagen, I spent a lot of time being alone at home, but I don't feel insecure about it. In fact, I am quite enjoying my solo time, it's my time to reflect, to relax and to do things I wanna do. Thus I could proudly tell myself, yes I am alone, but I am not lonely :)

Cheers,

Indispensable Lady

I Love My Country, Do You?

I've just read a friend's blog written about a month ago about the chaos in Indonesia, regarding the increase in fuel price. The point he wrote is beyond just the changes in fuel price, but concerning the disappointment of the community towards the government, towards reformation which supposed to be bring Indonesia to somewhere better, but apparently bring less results than expected.

I believe the effect of the disappointment could result in something worse than just a chaos, it will discourage people to believe in the government, in the possibility of the country to develop. I could see on social media how people often complain about the country's condition, the corrupt society and the unreliable house of people's representatives. I'm afraid the situation may create apathetic environment where people turn ignorant over the growth and development of the country. It may also make people more emotional as they see how the rich gets richer using the country's money while the poor gets poorer.

Sometimes it strikes me, as I do have hope for the country to improve. Despite all the negativity, our country still has many aspects to be proud of. It's a relieve to see how the new generations start to make action to build a better Indonesia instead of losing hope and giving up. One of them who actively promoting the nationalism movement is Pandji Pragiwaksono, he encouraged young people to love and have optimism towards our country. In his blog he featured several people who I also feel bring new inspirations to others to change Indonesia into a better place.

As for me, I have the wish to promote peace among Indonesian people, as nowadays people tend to get angry and do destructive things over small stuff. I haven't figured out yet the exact action, but I'm thinking of using photography as a channel of promoting the importance of peace environment, perhaps making a photography book or an exhibition.

Another one, I want to help my surroundings to have a better future by having a proper financial plan in order to be strong financially and in consequence can help the needy. I could say I have contributed a little bit on this one by sharing my financial plan knowledge to my family and friends. Further action is through participating in Indonesia's stock exchange, as by having more local investors, it will create more stable market for Indonesia.

My other vision is to promote Indonesia to the global world in terms of tourism. I know it may still a long way to go, but my husband and I wish that we could be a travel consultant from here to encourage people in Denmark to visit Indonesia and experience the beauty of the country, which in the end, will bring more income to the country.

Yeah I know, they all just small steps and may not impact directly to the development of Indonesia, but that are the things I am willing to do as a form of love for my country.

Cheers,
Indispensable Lady

His Plan is Better than Yours

My today's post is gonna be a little bit religious since I got inspiration from the priest's homily. Yes, I grew up in Catholic family, which is quite active at church and we go to church every week. I could say I was raised into a good Catholic girl and has good relationship with God. However I must say there were times that I feel very distant from God. The worst was like 5 years ago, I was having a very breakdown period in my life, where everything I wanted just fell into pieces. I got used to achieve anything that I want easily as I planned and at that moment, it frustrated me as I couldn't make life ran as I wanted it to be. I was very unhappy and felt lonely almost all the time.

Nevertheless, God always find a way to pull me back to His way. I began to start wondering, what God wanted from me, what He thought is the best for me because all I wanted is just be happy again and embrace my life. At first I struggled in listening to Him. I even wondered how do you know whether it is God's voice or it is my mind saying things I wanted to hear. Then my best friend once reminded me when I told her about my confusion in understanding God's will, she said, maybe it's not because God didn't show you what you should do, He had lead the way, it's you who didn't want to hear and accept it because His way is different than what you expected. Her words stroked me quite hard.

From that moment on, I realized that God spoke to me in many ways, one of them is through closest friends' advices. However it is me who chose to blind my eyes and cover my ears as His way is different than my will. Then I changed my prayer from begging things to work out as I wanted, into praying so that I could listen to His word and follow His will. Afterwards, my life got a whole lot better and it turned out His plan is always way so much better than ours. I received a lot more blessing and happiness I couldn't even imagine I would get if I didn't follow His plan. Couldn't feel more grateful having God lead my life this far. He is truly my shepherd and now I surrender my life to His plan, to His calling, wherever He may lead, I will follow, because now I know, His plan is always beautiful and He will guide me through difficult times as long as I follow His path.

At the end of the homily, the priest sang this song, which is beautifully expressing how I feel:

Shepherd of my soul I give you full control,

Wherever You may lead I will follow.

I have made the choice to listen for Your voice,

Wherever You may lead I will go.

Be it in a quiet pasture or by a gentle stream,

The Shepherd of my soul is by my side.

Should I face a mighty mountain or a valley dark and deep,

The Shepherd of my soul will be my guide.

Shepherd of my soul 

Oh You have made me whole,

Where ever I hear You call how my tears flow.

How I feel your love how I want to serve gladly give my heart to You O Lord.

Be it in the flowing river or in the quiet night,

The Shepherd of my soul is by my side.

Should I face the stormy weather or the dangers of this world.

The Shepherd of my soul will be my guide.

Cheers,
Indispensable Lady

Those Tiny Little Feet

This is my 26 weeks of pregnancy and the baby starts kicking a little bit harder than before, sometimes I could even feel his feet underneath my stomach. The question I often heard during my pregnancy is how do you feel being pregnant?

For guys or those who has never been pregnant perhaps wondering, how would it feel to have another living soul inside your body. Well, I used to stumble for a while for answering such question. Not that I don't feel anything, but it's a little bit hard to put your feelings into words. Nevertheless, I try to share it with you on this special post :)

Firstly, it is my husband who suspicious that I am pregnant. At that time I often asked him to eat some specific foods, which is quite rare. I used to let him pick the restaurants or foods to eat. However, we were waiting for the news of job application in Copenhagen, which my husband applied to. I said, "Let's do the pregnancy test when we have received the news from Denmark's office, hence, whatever the result of job interview is, we would have good news :)"

A couple of days later, I went to the gym and when I did the cardio, I felt a little bit ache around my stomach. I decided to stop the cardio, because I thought if I really was pregnant, I didn't want to harm the baby. On the next day, he is notified that he got the job. As promise before, I took the pregnancy test that night and the result is positive. I couldn't forget the look of my husband, he lost his word and looked surprise, because the month before, we did the test since my period was late for two weeks, but it was negative. However, we really excited to welcome the little baby, we hugged for a moment and told our family the two good news.

The first trimester, I wasn't feel very healthy, I got nausea a lot and sometimes vomit, I couldn't eat or smell certain foods, such as garlic, rice and other food with strong taste. I was having a hard time to sleep at night and often felt dizzy and sleepy. I remembered I rejected every activities and chose to stay at home all day. However, I didn't have much to do at home since staring at computer or watching TV more than 30 minutes caused me nausea and dizzy. I experienced mood swings during the that time as I felt helpless not knowing how to handle my own body.

After I got to the second trimester, I got over with the nausea and dizziness. I got back to my activities and had my daily schedule full with the moving preparation. Physically, I started to gain weight, had bigger tummy and slowly changed my type of clothes into the loosen one. While mentally, I began to be more mature by controlling emotion and being responsible.

Recently I found the article regarding hypnobirthing, a relaxation technique that helps you to experience the birth labor with calmer mind and attitude, which in consequence helps to reduce the pain and stress during labor. I bought the book and started to listen to the CD attached to practice the hypnobirthing at home. Having more knowledge about the importance of relaxation in facing the life changes and accepting the natural process of birth labor, influenced me in someway by having more positive attitudes towards life and the pregnancy.

As a result, I don't stress out even though I live on my own now, apart from close family and no one to help cleaning the house, doing laundry or cooking. In contrary, I am enjoying the changes and embracing the experiences. I also engage more with the baby, talking to him everyday, playing classical music for him and practicing the hypnobirthing relaxation once or twice a day. I feel more closer to the baby and I believe he starts to understand my words as he kicked me with those tiny little feet when I asked him to.

Now, I just couldn't wait to welcome him to the world, showering him with love and tenderness and getting ready to be a good mother for him.

I love you my baby, see you soon in 3 months :)

Cheers,
Indispensable Lady

A Love Note

I am a believer of "Love at the First Sight", but you are the exception. You didn't wow me the first time we met and not even long after we knew each other. We were in the same circle of friends but we couldn't even be considered close friend.

It is true that God's plan sometimes beyond our expectation. In such way, He brought us together, He brings you into my life and He leads me into yours. I still remembered how you slowly amazed me in many ways. Your way of thinking, the gentleness of yours and how comfortable it is talking to you because you listen to me like no one does. I used to think I couldn't fall for someone who didn't impress me at the first sight, but then again, you are the exception. 

Years gone by and I love you even more for many other reasons. People said, love conquers all. Well I guess it's true, it conquers all our discrepancies that blocked our way in the beginning of our relationship. And now all I can feel is grateful, having you as mine, couldn't think of anyone better than you as my life partner. You make me proud, you make me feel loved and most of all you complete my happiness.

This is once in a lifetime love and your heart will always be my home.

Love you,

Indispensable Lady

Failure in Life

Recently I am crazy about making quotes with my own photo portfolio. It is fun, actually, playing with words and photo at the same time. Hopefully you'll like the above quote :)

The most influenced person in my life once told me, "Do not be afraid to fail." I think it is a powerful advice, indeed. I know I'm not a risk taker type and sometimes the fear of failing is keeping me away from good opportunities. That's is the reason why I wrote this quote to remind myself that a failure is best teacher to help you grow.

Let us learn to embrace the failure in life, be grateful that you can experience it, and leave it behind you and move forward after take the learning with you.


Cheers,
Indispensable Lady

Indispensable Lady

As promised yesterday, this post is dedicated to explain the history behind choosing "Indispensable Lady" as this blog name. Have you checked your dictionary yet what indispensable means?
According to http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/indispensable is this:

in·dis·pen·sa·ble

   [in-di-spen-suh-buhl] 

adjective

1.

absolutely necessary, essential, or requisite: an indispensable member of the staff.

2.

incapable of being disregarded or neglected: an indispensable obligation.


And of course, by this explanation, I am referring to the number one definition. I heard about this vocabulary firstly from my husband's book, which was given by his senior colleague at work.


I thought it is a very inspiring word. Let us think, everybody must want to be special and needed by their surroundings. Being such one, you're irreplaceable, you're the one everyone is looking for when they needed help, comfort or somebody to count on.


Then, I have always had this confusion whenever I have to answer who am I? Why? Because sometimes when such answer is asked, most people will answer them with their career (a doctor, a lawyer, an accountant, etc) or their role in family (a husband, a wife, a daughter, etc). However, those answers are not satisfied me. I believe we're human being are something more than just a label of career or family role.  Therefore, it makes me thinking, if I couldn't answer that question right now, at least I could think of who I wanna be and work towards that so that one day I could answer such question with pride.


And there it goes why I choose that I want to be "Indispensable Lady". At least when I died, I want to be remembered by people I care the most how special I am to them, because what I have given them in life. It is because I am "essential" to their life or in working team.


In order to be indispensable of course there are many things to do. Firstly, you should be a loving person, of course. Who wants to be near to someone who complains all the time, full of hatred and negativity? Furthermore, you should have that extra ability to do something better than others, otherwise, how could you be irreplaceable? Well, in conclusion, you should be a better person to be indispensable, and what could be a better life resolution than that, right?


Having this purpose of life, definitely mature me in some way. I have the urge to be more positive in seeing changes in life, treat others better and be more loving to others. It also makes my learning desire grows, because I want to be good at something I love doing, by learning hopefully I could be better than others and share my learning to others needed.


So, do you want to be indispensable? Share with me your purpose of life :)


Cheers,
Indispensable Lady